TREADMILLS

determination
is it's own salvation
when you're tapped
into the quick
and the blood runs freely
from your fingers
your mind stops
your heart stops -
I can't shake
this sense of frustration
that I've been dragging around
behind me
for so long
dissappointment really
it's a bunch of cinder blocks
all chained and bolted together
and they drag me down
but I grit my teeth
til they chip
and I stare
at that triangle in the fabric
and I focus
like ten thousand samurai
and I cut throught it all
with the sharpest resolve
and for that moment
maybe three seconds
I am indomitable
I am impossibly sure
I am completely unwilling
and entirely willing
and marble and liquid
and fluid and steadfast
I am the steel and the fire
i am the machine, it seems
my arms move in time
my body has no weight
and for a moment
I am a child
no back pain
or heavy heart
no fear
or shackles
or goals
no bills
no banks
no understanding of calories
for that moment
I am completely and utterly
free
and it is not a perfect body
or the opinions of others
that drives me
that moves my feet
those first few steps -
it is the rememberance
of that moment of freedom
and so I am determined
and thus
i am saved